How Do People Fall In Love?

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Everywhere I turn, I see people in love. If I go for a walk, I inevitably run into at least a few couples holding hands on the street, when I go to Uni I see them sitting together being all cute and cuddly in lectures, if I go to a restaurant I see them having romantic dinners, and if I go online I'm presented with lovey-dovey pictures and posts on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Tumblr. Now that Valentine's Day is coming, this is becoming ever more apparent everywhere, and it's left me wondering: how do people meet and fall in love? Don't get me wrong, I understand the biology of it, but that's not what I mean; I'm talking about how these situations even present themselves, because to me it's a complete and utter mystery.

One of the most catching songs ever, but does it work irl?

I was in love once many years ago. It was unrequited and I was devastated (plot twist: I'm completely over it, and we're really good friends, so don't cry for me Argentina). That was the only time I've ever been really in love. Sure, I've liked guys, perhaps even been infatuated with a few, but this guy was the only guy I've ever thought of as "Wow, I'd like him to be my boyfriend" (not counting the, to be frank, quite embarrassingly long list of celebrities that I of course have been in serious, committed relationships with. These don't seem to last beyond your early to mid teens though, I'm afraid). It takes a lot for me to fall in love, I suppose. Perhaps I'm picky, but I don't think so. It just seems that preferring tall, dark, and handsome men with a very high IQ eliminates a lot of possibilities, but I just couldn't ever date anyone stupid (I said "stupid", how very non-PC of me). Intelligence is at the top of my list, sharing first place with "great sense of humor", and of course I want this wrapped up in a pretty package.

Someone who looks like the guy on the left (Spanish male model Alejandro Rosaleny), but has the brains of the guy on the right (in case you're really thick that's Stephen Hawking). Is that really too much to ask for?

Back on point. I don't think that my idea of an "ideal man" is to blame for me not falling in love; we all have all sorts of ideas of what we want, and more often than not we end up with something else. The really interesting question is why doesn't anyone seem to fall in love with me either? Am I really that unlovable? To my knowledge, no guy has ever been in love with me. No guy has ever given me the slightest inclination that they even like me! Well, obviously many guys "like" me, I mean, I have a lot of male friends. It's easy when you're the chick that loves to eat pizza and play video games, and doesn't feel the need to gossip or flirt with your male friends. Doesn't really inspire attraction, though. Not in my experience anyway. I think, secretly, most guys really do want a dominant, whip-lashing, mother-hen girlfriend, and I'm just not that girl. It's way too much effort having to control another person. Also, I hate playing mind games. I just lay everything on the table from the start because I feel it simplifies things, and you don't have to get mad about things later on that you said you were OK with in the beginning ("Noooo honey, PLEASE go to strip clubs with your friends, I'm totally cool with that!).

I think this is pretty much ideal, most of the time.

I guess I'm sort of to blame myself. I never accept dates, tend not to write men back, and don't believe in one night stands. You could say I'm kind of setting myself up for failure. I just need to feel the spark instantly, you know? If it's not there immediately, it just doesn't happen for me. If I'm not thrilled at the prospect of going on a date with you the minute you ask me, I have a very hard time saying yes, and it's not because there's anything wrong with you or because I don't expect to have a good time, it's just.. if you've experienced that spark with anyone, you know that that's what you want.

What was that? Unrealistic? STOP BEING SUCH A PESSIMIST!

In the end, I probably should try doing something out of my comfort zone, seeing as the style that I'm currently rocking isn't really doing me any good. I guess if I was one of those "ermahgerd I need a berfrernd" kind of girls, I would, but changing patterns takes effort and when you're pretty much happy as is, it takes extra effort. I really should try to change the kind of guy I become interested in, though. I seem to be a magnet for men who seem nice, but really aren't. I wonder if all men are liars, or just the ones that seem to gravitate towards me (YES, I am projecting the responsibility onto them!).

Please confirm.

What is it with the lying anyway? I'm such an open person, there is no need to lie to me. I was recently involved with someone for a very short period of time, but (for reasons unknown to me) I fell hard and fast. There were problems with it from the start, and it turned out I had been lied to from day one. I guess, somewhere, I should have known, but sometimes even when you try to do it right and play by the book, it still goes really wrong.

They're never different!  Don't fall for it!

So now, here I am. February 13th, Valentine's Day is just around the corner, and everyone is getting really excited. I've never actually celebrated Valentine's Day with anyone, but I can say that this year will be different: I actually have a date.. with a bunch of friends! We're going out for my friend's birthday, in fancy dress, and having a lot of few drinks! It will be the best Valentine's Day ever! I'm going as a hippie, I think. Very appropriate, free love and all that. Very V-Day!

Let's hope there won't be any of this happening on Valentine's Day!

As per usual, this blog post started out as one thing and turned into something completely different. But please, if you're the type of person that's always seeing someone/always in a relationship, leave me a comment explaining how this works, because I'm in a completely different boat! Perhaps we can swap tips (you'll be like "You just need to settle and be happy that anyone is willing to even tolerate you", and I'll be like "don't settle for anything less than a supermodel oil sheikh with the brain of Einstein").

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Yours,